I wanted to do a few follow up posts on the subject of forgiveness. Forgiveness is a deeply needed practice in our world. When I encourage someone (or myself!) to forgive often I will hear reasons it is not an option. But, I find that the barriers come out of a misunderstanding of what forgiveness is and isn’t.
Let’s look at some things forgiveness is not so we can be free to forgive.
Forgiveness is NOT:
- A feeling that all is well.
- Pretending that we weren’t hurt.
- Saying the other person isn’t wrong – excusing behavior away.
- Necessarily restoring the relationship (reconciliation takes two.)
- Automatically confronting the person.
- Forgetting – there is not a requirement for trust again.
- Relieving the other person from their responsibility.
I think one of the greatest barriers to forgive is the concern that we will have to act like nothing happened. But, that is not forgiveness.
Tomorrow we’ll explore what forgiveness is so we can forgive and experience freedom!
What do you think are the biggest barriers to forgive?
